Picking up the pieces And setting things right (Heiman Shipping)
by StevenMastin01
Summary: Following Heidi and Eric's break up in the Season 21 premier of Southpark. Comes this Heiman shipping fan fiction. I was devastated and couldn't help but have but have an empty feeling after seeing Eric dump Heidi and worse off to see him back to his evil old self. So I made this where Eric is trying to make it up to her. But will Heidi forgive him?
1. Chapter 1

Picking up the pieces and setting things straight.

Southpark Fanfiction. By Steven Mastin T+

SPOILER ALERT!I  
I live in the UK, so I have to wait till the Friday after the Southpark airing in the states to watch it. I was so devastated to see Heidi and Eric break up. And worse yet to see Eric back to his evil self. Which I know is what most fans wanted, but not me. So since I finished watching the episode at 10:30pm I have been up planning this. Well I slept a little. So here is the first chapter of a Heiman Shipping romance story. It's set after the 1st episode of Southparks 21st season. Eric feels bad and in fact hates himself for dumping Heidi, he wants to make it up to her and get some revenge, but he doesn't know where to start. I guess he better ask Alexa.

 ** **Chapter 1****

The sun was setting over the quiet Mountain Town of Southpark, where nine years old Heidi Turner lay awake in her bed. She was watching tv, paying little attention to what she was watching as she fought about the heartbreak she felt on the inside.

"So what we're gonna do Lilly and Les, is were gonna tear down the walls between your living room and dining to room, to make for a more spacey area," Randy explained, his voice was a blur as it lay inside Heidi's ear-along side the lines of her beloved ex Eric Cartman. Who had recently dumped her.

"What did I do to him? What does he mean I have issues? I thought he loved me," she thought as a tear rolled down her cold and pale cheeks.

"Damn you Alexa, Damn you world, you have ruined my life," Eric Cartman shouted at Alexa, the inanimate object had quickly spread through the town-as the big trendy thing, and of course only Eric Cartman would find a away to have fun with it.

"You ruined my life," Alexa responded in a deep womens voice.

"No God Damn it Alexa-shut up," Eric teared up.

"No God Damn it Alexa shut up," the speaker repeated. Eric dived into his duvet and sobbed, he saw his phone just a hand reach away on the table, he wanted badly to reach it, just to give a special someone a call, but he just couldn't do it. He wrestled with himself angrily as he cuddled his stuffed frog, Clyde frog.

"Don't cry Eric, your super awesome and kewlll," said PollyPrissy pants. PollyPrissyPants was another one of Erics stuffed toys, this one took the form of a female baby doll.

"But I'm not kewl, I had everything going for me and I just shut the door on her, she wasn't out to get me, she wanted to help, I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions-I-I shouldn't have listened to everyone else," Eric replied tearfully. He threw his toys at his bedroom door and hid his face.

Eric and Heidi had been dating sine they both quit social media, several months ago, but after some convincing from Butters, Eric was sure Heidi just wanted him for his sense of humor and semen. The bare irony of how Eric had been working so hard to try and fight that false belief; deeply angered him.

"Alexa, Do women just want men for their sense of humor and semen," Eric asked wiping his eyes.

"No-Women want men to be able to reproduce, to have someone to care for them, to be there for them and also just so they can do that back," Alexa replied.

"I knew it! Even if everyone other women in Southpark was like that, It wasn't Heidi and it never was. What have I done?" Eric slammed his hands on his bed and kicked his duvet across the room.

"Alexa, How do I make it up to an ex?" Eric asked.

"Take her to Mc'donalds and buy her a milkshake," Alexa finished. Eric's eyes widened, as he picked up his phone, he began to text Heidi.

"Please don't let her have blocked me, please, please," Eric thought in worry.

"Dude, you should call her instead and be confident," Alexa added, from out of nowhere.

Eric froze.

He had a flashback to how horrible he had been to her, the words he spoke in anger and fear and under the pressure of everyone else, they flashed in his mind, causing him to break down.

"I don't dare even talk to her, Alexa,"Eric shouted.

"Oh my God, dude stop being such a pussy. Do you want her or not? Do it!" Alexa boomed.

"The fudge," Eric instantly replied. He paused. "Your right!" He moved his trembling finger up the phone screen of his Samsung Galaxy S8. (Damn rich kid. But it is Eric.) He gently tapped the green phone icon. Nothing happened. He tapped it harder. And the phone began to dial. He took a deep breath.

"Eric!"Heidi shouted in excitement.

"Err-Hey Heidi, I-I" (He stuttered and then sniffled) I am so sorry, what I said to you- I haven't been honest with you, a lot's going on-and I guess- I guess I just was too stupid to realize you wanted to help me,"

"What is it boo? Please tell me this time," Heidi asked in concern as she sniffled and wiped her tears.

"Were you crying-Heidi?" Eric asked.

"Well-The break up- I just-since it's happened it's all that's been on my mind,"

"Yeah- I err know the feeling, b-b-babe," Eric's voice trailed off.

"Tell me everything Eric," Heidi said sternly.

He took a deep breath-and began

"It all started when we were at Space x. Butter's got jealous of you and me," he began to speed up the pace of what he was saying. "He said all girls are trouble, he said you just wanted me for my humor and semen, I stupidly believed him" He slowed down. "And I'm so sorry, women are so smart and so funny, and I really mean it,"

"I know you do, You have proven that so often,"

"I love you Heidi even if I haven't shown it recently,"

"I love you too."

"I want to take you out for a meal tomorrow, wou-would you like that?"

 ** **To be continued..****

I'll get the following chapter asap. I hope you enjoyed. Please rate and review.


	2. Chapter 2

(From this point on I have changed my stories genre a little, which I know isn't very professional but what I wanna aim for is more of an old school episode of Southpark, I'd say more but that would give away the plot.)

 ** **Chapter2:****

Eric's heart beat increased as he awaited her answer, there was an awkward silence. What was Heidi thinking?

"Back in a minute boo, I need to take a dump," She stated. Eric paused for a second and began to laugh hysterically. " So So funny," he chuckled. His smile faded as he remembered he was still awaiting Heidi's answer.

"What if she won't take me back, what is she ignores me or even falls down the toilet like Clyde's mom," he began to panic, he paused shortly as his expression became menace. "If she does then I will take Butters down permanently, the stupid, jealous butt fucking son of a bitch,"Eric growled. The clock ticked second by second minute by minute as he waited silently.

"Hey boo,I'm back,"

"Hey," Eric replied cheerfully. He was glad to be talking to her again, but the same worry still lay in his mind.

"Oh my Gosh I just took the biggest crap,"Heidi exclaimed with a chuckle.

"What!" Eric exclaimed in surprise-he then remembered how often he said women were funny, so he began to give her a fake laugh but it soon turned into a real one as he imagined his beautiful girlfriend shitting explosively into the toilet.

"Your so funny Heidi," he complimented.

"And smart too right?" Heidi asked.

"Yeah of course you are, your Emoji analylis was so genius," he replied.

The moment finally came.

"So tomorrow, you wanna go to Mcdonalds-huh?" Heidi asked, she had no emotion in her voice. Was she implying she was: afraid, angry, happy or sad about the thought of it? Eric began to wander.

"Yeah-It will be nice, I have been such a dick lately and I just wanna see you again, you tell me some super funny jokes and we just have a good time," Eric explained.

"Sure thing boo, But do you promise that you'll tell me everything that's going on, because I just wanna help, you know that right?" Heidi queried.

"Yeah, I remember-you and me don't keep secretes,"

"That's right, Goodnight babe, I love you," Heidi smiled as she began to make herself comfy in her stupid spoiled whore duvet covers.

"Goodnight Heidi, Sweet dreams," Eric finished as he hung up the phone. He scrambled out of his bed and began to pick up his toys. With Clyde frog in his left hand and PollyPrissy Pants in his right, he climbed back into his bed, and with that he tucked himself in his tokens life matters duvet and shut his eyes.

Meanwhile 4 houses down the lane, everyones favorite blonde was stood in his bed room dancing and singing.

"Lu lu lu, I got some apples, Lu lu lu, I broke them up two, Lu Lu lu now he's one of the rest of the boys, lu lu lu moowaaahahahah," Butters laughed evilly. His eyes glowing satanically red. He leaped onto his spinny chair and flew across his bedroom towards his PC, he logged in and opened a file named: 'How I'm going to get Eric back for all the things he has done to me.' He clicked it and a Microsoft word 2003 page began to load. (Ha poor)

"Oh my God so slow!" Butter shouted as he smacked his mouse furiously on it's mouse mat. His mouse mat was bright pink with a picture of Pinkie pie and Apple Jack on it, with the words 'I 3 My little pony' written along the top of it.

The next day soon came by, as the sun began to rise above some distant tree's melting snow at every mountains summit. A flock of doves flew by as Heidi happily skipped along the avenue to her boyfriends home. Boom! She hit something.

"Boo, are you alright," Eric asked as he saw his girlfriend stumbling left and right.

"Eric?" She questioned. As her blurred vision soon became clear. "Whaa!" She began to fall backwards.

"I got ya," Eric said as he caught her in his arms. Heidi looked upwards and gave him a kiss on the lips, Eric smiled and leaning forwards gave her one back. He helped her to stand on her feet sturdy.

"You alright now," Eric asked in concern.

"Yeah, thanks boo," She replied kissing him once again. "Cheese burgers and chocolate milkshakes are a waiting us- lets go," she finished with a smile. The pair stood hand in hand in hand and walked down the street happily. But the…

"What the?" Butters said as he saw them through his bed room window. But I got them to break up. Heidi was crying about it. I guess they made up. Butters thought. "But Ha not for long!" Butters grew a devious smile as he began to turn on his assistant Alexa.

"Thanks to Eric and the boys I know how to use you now, and so you will obey my every command- as Professor Chaos takes over this puny little town," Butters laughed evilly once again.

"Alexa, What is Heidi Turners Mobile phone number," Butters asked, as he rubbed his hands in evil delight.

Since Butters was dumped by his girlfriend Charlotte; a brown haired Canadian he had been fighting his heart break. From rallying Wieners out, to being a gentlemen. Or at least pretending to. With his real intentions undercover. Butters found it unfair that someone as bad as Eric ended up with a girlfriend, why the rest of the boys in Southpark had been dumped. After confessing how unfair he believed it was to his best friend Kyle Brofsloski the two had decided to formulate a plan to make Heidi and Eric break up. However both of them have their real intentions hidden.

"Stupid fatass, I'm gonna make him pay for everything he's ever done to me," Butter boomed.

"Alexa, does not give away personal information," The computer replied.

"Oh son of a biscuit!-Fine guess I'll do it the old fashion way," Butters finished. He picked up his phone and began to dial Kyle.

"Hey Kyle,"

"Oh Hey butters- How is operation Alpha going?" He asked.

"Not to great, Heidi and Eric are back together, I just saw them kissing,"

"What how? You did everything I said right-right?" Kyle asked perplexed.

"Yeah I completely warped his mind, made him think Heidi was out to get him, but now they're somehow back together," Butters explained.

"Oh jeez, this is bad, erm-okay- begin plan B," Kyle finished as he hung up. And with that Kyle walked towards his bedroom window.

"Everyone around me gets an awesome relationship-except me, I can't get what I want, because he's straight. Damn it! I love you Eric, and no matter what I takes, I will your heart," Kyle laughed evilly.

It was now late morning, Eric and Heidi we're sat in Mcdonalds eating lunch together. It was fairly quiet with it being only 11am, which gave Eric the perfect opportunity to be completely honest for the first time, and let Heidi know how much she really does mean to him.

"You've started dipping your french fries in the bbq sauce too?" Heidi asked as she smiled, sipping her milkshake.

'Yeah, It's the best, Boo try it!" Eric replied with a smile, and with that she stole one of Eric's french fries and dipped it in his BBQ sauce tub.

"Wow that is good," she said as she swallowed the french fry. There was a sudden ding, it was Heidi's phone.

"Oh- It looks like someone has messaged me on Messenger," she said in surprise. As she removed her Samsung s8 galaxy from her pocket.

"Oh cool, your still using the phone I got you for your birthday," Eric smiled.

"Yeah, How did you managed to buy yourself and buy one for me as well anyway?" Heidi asked.

"I just asked for my allowance for the next 6months earlier it took a few but moooomms but i got there," Eric explained.

"Your the best Eric,"Heidi said. She reached over the table and kissed him on the lips. Soon after Eric stole her milkshake-he had several sips and began to tease her with it. They both giggled.

"Oh it's butters," Heidi said as she clicked on the notification.

"What the fuck does that little shit want!," Eric finished.

To be continued..

Things are getting pretty interesting now. Chapter 3 out soon. I'm at college the next 3 days so this chapter may take a little longer to arrive. Thanks for reading. Remember to leave a review, and add into your favorites so you can see it first, when the new chapters are up.


End file.
